It’s been a while and I’ve not had tears to cry. It’s been a while and I’ve not had to tell a lie.
Because in fact, much has been alright, and since I stepped out of the night, the lighter thoughts have calmed me down.
And now I am as the sun at noon, belonging in my own right, but the loss of tears seems to have stolen the sparkle from my eyes.
I’ve written much less this season but not from a lack of creativity. It’s been good news of late, good news that I seem to have subconsciously decided to savour rather than deliver.
I used to get lost in my words but I’d rather get lost for words. Laughter and smiles has kept me pre-occupied… What a blessing.
I can’t seem to be of much use to old friends now that I am here…we used to cry all night long about things we didn’t realise we couldn’t change. I know for sure that I’ve not yet buried the hatchet, and the wine is proof that I’m still a little ratchet.
But I’ve got no tears for that now – and I haven’t for a while. I lost a good friend just hours after promising that we’d be here together, but these things happen, in the meantime I’ll just stay pretentious…borderline specious, that nothing goes before season, and our short time came with reason.
Things are going alright for the raggedy dog, love does certainly save the soul. Peace is given to those who keep their eyes on their own piece. Happiness is a little more complicated, but laughter is a free trial to get you closer.
It would be a shame to think that my talent only comes with misery, that she only works as a coping mechanism. I’ll just have to make time for her as I did when we first fell in love, when her kisses still filled my belly with butterflies and we held hands as I showed her to the applause of the world, and I was that much closer to becoming a man. I could not stay away from her doorstep, inflamed with infatuation at the sight of her ease to make me giggle inside… And now that she’s a permanent resident under the cages of my ribs, let me not neglect her while I still have no tears to cry.